LynnNChicago Real Housewives of New Jersey
Tonight the show opens with the entire group getting together at Jacqueline’s place, couples arrived one by one and the conversation was all about Teresa, until Teresa arrived. There is a down side to being fashionably late. Jac said very little but just took it all in. This group can’t get over the cookbook comments.
The occasion, a poker game for the men and an old-fashioned gab fest over cocktails for the ladies. Before the festivities begin, Teresa wants to make a speech but it seems as though no one wants to hear it because it took her several tries to get them to all shut up and let her speak. Teresa explained that she never meant to hurt anyone’s feelings with the comments in her cookbook but she apologized if she did offend anyone.
Quite honestly it seemed scripted and it was as if Teresa was back on Celebrity Apprentice, she was nervous and uneasy. The group didn’t seem all that impressed with the apology and Melissa said, “we’re happy to take one for the team if it helps to make you more money with the book”. Ok I paraphrased, she said something like that.
Teresa wasn’t getting Melissa’s sarcasm but her husband Joe Giudice told Teresa, “enough, shut up”. He is always telling her to shut up so she ignored him as usual. Good for you Teresa! Here’s the thing, Teresa knew when she put those comments in her book that she would have to face these people someday so I don’t think she truly meant to be mean to anyone. If she hadn’t mentioned her cast mates in the book, her readers would have been disappointed. We’ve seen it before with other Housewives books. This anger that the group feels toward Teresa is not about a cookbook. Check out Jacqueline’s tweet about this night
@JacLaurita When Teresa apologized2every1,I went2go stand beside her&then told her that I was proud of her 4 doing it.replay&u’ll see me walk toward her
Of course Bravo edited that out, we wouldn’t want anyone to think that Teresa had any support from anyone this season. Bravo is determined to focus on the 4 vs. 1 plotline.
The awkward apology is over and the men adjourn to the basement to play poker. Clearly Bravo’s producers decided that filming the poker game was getting boring and the hour was late so they packed it in before the real fun started. Joe Giudice emerged from the friendly poker game with a black eye and a bloody nose. Damn those Bravo cameramen, if they just put in a little overtime we could have had front row seats to the wrestling match!
When a man like Joe Giudice continuously tries to grab other men’s balls, it’s only a matter of time before someone clocks him a good one this time it was Richie Wakile’s balls that Giudice focused on. According to Joe Gorga, the two men ended up wrestling and Giudice got nailed in the face by an elbow or something. Giudice blames it on Richie’s lack of balls, as he wasn’t able to get a hold of anything. Drunk men will do stupid things. Giudice tells us that a “business man with a black eye” isn’t the best look, luckily he is not a businessman.
Ashley Holmes is like a bad penny, she keeps popping back up. Just when you think you’ve gotten rid of her, she misses her flight due to a Dunkin Donut emergency and lives to spend another night in the Laurita home. Albie Manzo had one job to do, put that bitch on a flight to Vegas, he can’t even do that right! Ashley admits to downing a bottle of Nyquil through a straw and popping some Xanex, I can’t imagine why her folks are worried about her.
Jacqueline tells us that Ashley won’t work, parties all night and sleeps all day. The plan is a two-week lockdown at Jac’s brother’s house in Vegas, she’ll have no car, no place to go and will learn Graphic Design from the Vegas relatives and will finish her banishment by spending some time with her dad in Texas. Funny how plans never go the way you want them to go.
The scene that takes place in the now closed pizzeria finds Joe Giudice explaining why he wasn’t able to make a go of this business. Lame excuses and laziness is what I got out of the whole fiasco. He needed a ride there, he couldn’t be there every day, it just got too hard…boohoo, poor Joe! This man is pathetic and couldn’t support his family if his life depended on it. Everything he touches turns to trash. Joe then tells his wife that he’s building a retirement community across the street where a gas station now sits. I doubt it ever happened, there is a lot of expense and environmental issues in putting housing where a gas station once existed.
Teresa has a book signing to do and her husband is in charge of feeding the kids and getting them to bed. Great job Joe. He manages to swear several times at his young girls “I’ll whip your ass” then when his youngest hurts herself and is bleeding, Joe pours himself a glass of wine while their oldest daughter, Gia takes care of it, she cleans little Adrianna’s booboo and puts her little sister to bed. I almost cried seeing that, these girls need their mother, clearly their father is a useless piece of garbage! If he can’t work and bring income into the household to support these kids, the least he could do is care for them properly. He just crossed the line into “completely useless”! I cannot stand that man!
Teresa is at her book signing while her girls are being verbally abused by their father, one fan fawns over Teresa and admits to coming all the way from Louisiana or somewhere just to see Teresa. What a wonderful thing to have on camera, a fan so excited and loves Teresa so much that she made that long journey just to see her favorite Housewife! If only this super-fan hadn’t stuck her foot in her mouth and brought up Joe Giudice’s arrest and the legal battles plaguing the Giudice’s.
For a minute Teresa just looked at this girl and clearly wondered if she was some sort of horrible troll who was there just to heckle and belittle her. Teresa looked like she was ready to drive this bitch right back to Louisiana herself. Teresa is so flustered by this girls comments that she writes “love” in the book twice… I doubt that “love” was what she really wanted to write. In the end the girl really was a fan who was trying to say that she supported Teresa but she just didn’t have the class to keep her mouth shut about Teresa’s husband.
Kathy’s family has a bit of a grown up moment for her 15-year old son who receives an email from a young woman of her naked body. Oooops, Mamma Kathy isn’t happy but Papa Richie tells the girl to hang in there for three more years and he’ll be sure to connect his son with the whore….er fan. They grow up too fast, Kathy, yes they do!
Melissa and her husband Joey are having a romantic dinner, Melissa has a surprise for him, a song that she recorded just for him called, “How Many Times, Dear Joe”. I know you’re all going to rip me apart but I really liked the song. I thought the words were beautiful and it was a touching tribute to her husband. I don’t care how much auto-tune had to be used, all singers use auto-tune to some extent and I still think her voice is much better than the other housewives who think they can sing. (yes that means you, Luann and Kim Zolciak) You can hear the song here:
Next week Melissa demands an apology from Teresa for saying that she would leave Joey for a richer man but Teresa isn’t prepared to apologize. The ladies get into a screaming match that doesn’t end well.
Thanks to Savannah Nicole for pointing out this little tidbit that I had missed:
On Celebrity Apprentice Teresa told Donald Trump that she named her daughter Milania after Trump’s wife but when the Jersey Housewives took a trip to Italy two season’s ago Teresa told us that she named her daughter after the Italian city where she was conceived. Kind of makes you go hmmmmmmm
Celebrity Apprentice by BB
Aubrey can’t imagine a world where Penn gets sent home over Dayana. Clay has mixed emotions about Dayana still being there, but he’s smart enough to figure out that some of his biggest competition is gone. Dayana knows she’s going to have to watch her back double.
Tonight’s episode is titled, “Jingle All The Way Home.” The challenge is for each team to write and produce a 90-second jingle for Good Sam’s Roadside Assistance program, and perform it in front of a live audience. Good Sam’s Roadside Assistance is a pre-paid emergency roadside assistance program for recreational vehicles.
Arsenio is the project manager for Unanimous and Dayana is the project manager for Forte. Clay says it’s her turn, but wait, hasn’t she done one since Lisa has done one? I can’t keep track. Trump is surprised Clay isn’t the project manager for Forte.
Dayana doesn’t understand what a jingle is and brings Christmas up. Lisa laughs inside. They decide Clay will be doing the singing. Dayana says they should all start writing things in rhymes and Clay tells her typically the melody is written first.
Aubrey brings up the idea of a cheerleading chant to music. Arsenio says it feels too “young woman.” Her second idea is a simple tap dance. Arsenio says he will not tap dance because it’s an insult to him as a Black man. He’s not going to do it. Teresa says she will do whatever is needed. Aubrey thinks Arsenio is the biggest girl on the show she doesn’t know why he is against cheerleading or tap dancing because he probably does both at home. Teresa feels very awkward and she doesn’t want to babysit them. Arsenio thinks Aubrey shuts down when she hears the word “no,” and it’s not going to be an easy task for him to manage.
Unanimous meets at the recording studio and Aubrey thinks they should be further along than they are. She and Arsenio are not getting along. Teresa feels like she’s in the middle. Aubrey says she can write a song in two seconds but they need to know the concept. The company executive shows up, and tells them they can be as creative as they want, but the audience is everyone, including moms, grandmothers and children. He says the mascot, Good Sam, should very much be incorporated in the jingle. The branding is most important to him. Teresa thinks mascot and cheerleading go together, and Arsenio goes along with Aubrey’s cheerleading idea.
At Forte, Clay and Lisa think a 50s or 60s type song fits in with the mascot, Good Sam. They meet with the executive and he tells them not to play it safe. Clay says doing a 60’s song is not playing it safe. He also tells them the branding is most important.
The musicians and engineer arrive at the studio with Unanimous. Aubrey takes over in explaining to the musicians what they want. Arsenio says he’d be a fool not to use Aubrey’s musical talents. Arsenio is letting her take it and run with it. He just wants her to be happy. He also wants to make sure she doesn’t take an inch and make it a mile.
At Forte, Clay is talking about the style they want. Dayana mentions Duran Duran. Clay says Good Sam and Duran Duran do not mix. They work with the musicians and Lisa is concerned about the time being wasted. They finally decide on a Frankie Valley style 60’s beat. Dayana says there is no time for her to fight them about it. Clay is getting frustrated that Dayana is being silly trying to act like she knows more about music than him. Dayana is talking nonsense about pink and yellow in the music. Huh?
Teresa is working with the graphics designer on posters, signs, and handouts. Arsenio asks Aubrey to help Teresa, while he works with the drummer on some beginning lines in for the jingle. They bring in some background singers and Aubrey gets involved with them instead of helping Teresa. Arsenio doesn’t think those guys need any direction from Aubrey, but I don’t see him stopping her.
At Forte, Clay is working on the jingle with Lisa and Dayana. Dayana has no idea what direction should be taken with the lyrics. Dayana wants to work together with Lisa and Lisa wants to do it by herself. She tells Dayana she wants to help her win the task, but she needs to do it by herself. The song gets written and Clay practices it. Lisa is very happy with it. Dayana wants to change it up and Clay is really getting irritated that she’s trying to tell him how to sing.
At Unanimous, Don, Jr., shows up to check on their progress. They get the singers in to sing the jingle song. Don, Jr. says not bad. He says execution is where they are going to make it or break it. Aubrey pulls Don, Jr. aside and throws Arsenio under the bus by telling him she’s been the only creative one on the team once again. Don, Jr. is shocked that Aubrey has done this to her project manager not even knowing whether they’ve won the challenge or not.
At Forte, Clay has never been more frustrated with a person, including the kids with disabilities he’s taught, as Dayana. Danaya thinks Clay and Lisa are ganging up on her. Dayana is still not onboard with the 60’s theme, but she has nothing better to offer. Don, Jr. shows up and Dayana tells him her ideas are not being heard. Lisa accuses Dayana of being passive aggressive. Clay takes up for Lisa. Lisa starts crying and says she is shocked at what Dayana is saying right in front of her. Dayana thinks she’s being unprofessional. Clay nicely tells Don, Jr. he and Lisa have done the bulk of the work since this is not Dayana’s area of expertise. Lisa leaves the room very upset and Dayana looks like the sane one of the two. I wish Lisa could have kept her cool. Hey, wait a minute! I could’ve sworn that last week Lisa said she was going to be nice to Dayana from then on. I guess she couldn’t help herself. But you know what, this time I’m with Lisa. Not only is Dayana not leading or helping in this task, she’s actually, albeit unknowingly, sabotaging it.
At Forte, Lisa returns to the room and Dayana is ignoring her. She is working on the signage and brand messaging. Clay says that’s the only thing she knows how to do. Lisa tells Dayana unless her first two words to her are “I’m sorry,” not to talk to her. Lisa says it is on and Dayana is going to get buried in the board room, especially if they lose.
At Unanimous, Arsenio sends Teresa and Aubrey to the rehearsal hall to work on the dancing. He keeps one background singer with him do work on the drum segment. Aubrey and Teresa call Arsenio to ask what the structure of the dance should be. Arsenio tells them to use their strengths and Aubrey thinks he’s become senile and not giving them very much direction. Arsenio thinks it’s good that Aubrey is asking him for direction. Aubrey is not impressed with Arsenio.
When they get to the studio, Aubrey pretty much takes over the direction of the jingle. Aubrey decides that Arsenio will be in the jingle with Teresa and that his speaking part will be at the end instead of the beginning. They practice with Sam, the mascot, then Arsenio shows up and Aubrey tells him how it’s going to go. It’s totally different from what Arsenio thought it was going to be. Arsenio decides not to do the drum part he had planned. Aubrey says they should include it and thinks Arsenio is throwing a tantrum. Teresa volunteers to do the drums just to keep the peace. She’s worried about them being able to put a show on together.
Forte walks into the rehearsal space and meets the dancers and singers. In the presentation, Lisa is going to act as a radio personality, Clay and the back-up singers will be doing the singing and dancing, and Dayana will be doing – nothing. Dayana is trying to direct the staging and she and Clay get into it. He tells Dayana he is a grown ass man and tells her to either take over and tell him what to do, or to shut up and let him do what he knows how to do. Dayana is not feeling she’s getting any respect as the PM.
It’s performance day. Clay peeks over to see what Aubrey is up to. From what he sees, he thinks their routine is far more unique and creative than Unanimous.
Forte is up first. It’s a cute performance, nothing amazing in my opinion. Lisa did a great job of playing the radio personality and Clay did well, too. Dayana comes out at the end and meekly tells the audience thanks. The executive thought the performance had a lot of energy. It was maybe too conservative and they played it a little safe. Dayana didn’t have any Good Sam colors on when she came out.
Now it’s Unanimous’ turn. They seem more pumped up about their upcoming performance. Teresa is very nervous. She and Arsenio go out first and act like they are stranded in the wilderness. Teresa is doing a good acting job with Arsenio. They have the audience laughing. Aubrey thinks their scene is horrible and it’s a shame they aren’t as talented as she is. Their jingle was more energetic than Forte’s. The executive thought it was great and he can’t get the jingle out of his head. He also liked the use of the mascot. He didn’t like Aubrey’s skimpy cheerleader outfit, though, because there were grandma’s in the audience.
Before the board room comes up, I’d like to say that, at this point in the competition, it’s very obvious Aubrey has a lot of creative talent and I have to give her props for it. However, she is so full of herself and such a braggart, it is just impossible for me to like her. Please, Aubrey, you could go so much further in life if you would just show a little humility and give others some credit where credit is due. Who, watching her on the Celebrity Apprentice, would want her involved in their project? Now I can certainly see why Diddy kicked her butt out of Danity Kane.
Ok, let’s get to the board room. Arsenio has a big smile on his face and he thinks his teammates carried him through with a hip and popping jingle. He says he would put Aubrey up against Clay any day. Teresa also thinks they won and Arsenio was a good project manager.
Trump asks Dayana if tonight is the night she’s gonna get fired. Lisa says if they lose, Dayana should be fired because she knew nothing about the task. It was Clay and her again, 45%, 45% against Dayana’s 10%. Lisa says it was not a fun task. This is the time Lisa is saying Dayana was a horrible project manager, when she has not done that in her past challenges. How could she critique the way Clay sang when she knows nothing about singing?
Dayana tries to explain how she managed. Dayana keeps playing the victim and I don’t think it’s going to work this time. Don, Jr. asks Dayana about the incident between them when he was present. Dayana talks about Lisa’s terrible temper and how unprofessional she is. Lisa says she does really well in her business and Dayana would never make it there. Lisa tells Dayana she doesn’t understand why she didn’t just let Clay and Lisa win the task for her when she absolutely knew nothing about the task at hand.
Lisa is saying she will attack the minute someone mis-represents her and she is ready to go at it with Dayana. Dayana doesn’t respect Lisa because of her mouth. Lisa doesn’t respect Dayana because she has nothing going on up there. She is the female Lou Ferigno. Dayana doesn’t know who she would fire if they lose. Don, Jr. asks Dayana how she would comment to Clay’s taking up for Lisa. She says neither one of them respected her on this task. Ivanka asks her if that’s a failure of leadership that she can’t control two people. Aubrey puts in her two cents that project managers should have no excuses. She takes up for Lisa and says Dayana saying that Lisa works only when she wants to is a false statement. Lisa tells Dayana it’s not Celebrity Miss Universe, it’s Celebrity Apprentice.
Trump asks Arsenio if he’d like to replace Aubrey with Dayana. Arsenio says he’d keep Aubrey. She’s a known entity. Trump says Lisa is much more vicious tonight than in the past. Lisa says that’s because Dayana deserves it tonight. Clay is just sitting there with his mouth shut. Dayana asks Lisa where her respect is for the Project Manager. Lisa tells her she doesn’t have any if it’s her. This is dragging out waaaaaay too long. Please, Mr. Trump, put a stop to it.
Trump asks Clay who’s right and who’s wrong. Clay sides with Lisa pretty much. He’s much nicer than Lisa is about it. Don, Jr. explains what the executive said about Forte. Forte was too safe and the branding was not that great, and Dayana didn’t participate enough. Ivanka tells them the executive liked Unanimous’ energy and branding. He didn’t like the sexy uniform of Aubrey’s and would have liked to have seen more of Teresa.
Arsenio wins $45,000 plus more from future sales for the Magic Johnson Foundation. Since there are only three of them, there will be no choosing who Dayana will be bringing back. This time Dayana needs to go in my opinion. There is no way she should go to the end and be named the Celebrity Apprentice. Her time is beyond up.
Dayana goes on and on about being disrespected. Trump asks Dayana if she doesn’t have to earn some respect. Ivanka tells Dayana she should have neutralized Lisa if she couldn’t have led her. Clay tells Trump after this task and the way Dayana handled it, it’s hard for him to respect her. It was tough because she micro-managed a task she knew nothing about. There is a style of management where she could have been in a more supportive role. Trump tells Dayana she’s fabulous and amazing, but she’s fired.
Trump definitely made the right decision. It was a no-brainer. I think I hear Lisa tell Dayana she is a good person after they hug and as she’s walking away.
OK, folks. In the preview of next week’s episode, Trump says two people will be fired. If so, than wouldn’t that mean there is not final four, but a final three since there are only five players left? Didn’t Jacqueline Laurita say Teresa made it to the final four? Makes me wanna say hmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Mob Wives by BB
Sometimes there can be too much of a good thing. This second season of Mob Wives is an example. This is episode 15. Season one only had 10 episodes. There you have it; I am over Mob Wives right about now. I think there is something to be said for leaving the audience wanting more.
Renee is leaving the courthouse where her father’s first hearing has taken place. She calls Big Ang and tells her she got the cold shoulder from her family and friends. But when her father came into the room, he turned to her and said “that’s my daughter.” Renee is glad her dad still loves her.
Big Ang is at her dermatologist’s office. She needs to look younger. She’s already had a lot of work done, a tummy tuck, liposuction, several boob jobs and her lips injected (like that wasn’t obvious). Now she wants some botox; no, not some botox, A LOT of botox, which she has never had before. Big Ang is not liking the botox injections one bit, but she loves the results and asks for more. Subtlety is not in Big Ang’s vocabulary.
Drita has a new puppy. Cute. She gets a call from her husband, Lee. Lee is being transferred from a state facility to a federal facility, which will be much closer to home. Drita is glad for her girls, but she’s not sure how she feels about him being right across the bridge.
Drita is at Bad Boy records because they want to cast her in a music video. She meets Nick and Jason, executives at Bad Boy. They explain the video to Drita, which involves robbing a bank. Hilarious since her husband is in prison for robbing a bank. She tells them this video is right up her alley. They tell Drita they may let her rap on the video sound track.
Big Ang is at Christina’s, her hair stylist, getting extensions. She tells her she wants a nice boyfriend with a lot of money. Her husband is currently living with his mom. She tells Christina she went from wise guys to a normal guy, but he’s not so normal. He goes from bar to bar night after night. Her marriage is not working out so well. He’s a good person and she’s going on a honeymoon getaway with him for one last chance.
Now that her book is done, Karen’s next venture is getting back into the Spa industry. She will be running the spa side of a facility being opened by a plastic surgeon. She meets with him and he tells her the opening of the spa will happen in two weeks. She has to get everything ready for the opening and plan the party too. She is determined to do this so she can get her daughter back living with her in New York. She shows Ramona what needs to be done and asks for her help. Ramona says she will do anything she can do to help. Karen also wants to get Renee involved to get her mind off her troubles. She asks Ramona if she
is going to be reliable and tells her she can’t pay other people to do it for her. She’s kidding, kinda.
Ramona, Renee and Karen go to a winery to pick out some wines for the opening. Karen explains to Renee what’s going on and asks Renee if she would like to help her and even come in and be a part of the Spa team. Renee and Ramona are both onboard. Karen gives Ramona the responsibility of setting up laser demonstrations for opening day. She asks Renee to be responsible for the gift bags for the party. They toast to partnership and family.
Drita meets with a producer at his studio so she can get some help with her rapping. She knows this is a one shot deal and she’s very anxious and nervous at first. The producer finally tells Drita to relax and some adlib rapping. Once the producer mixes it, it sounds like a pretty good rap track. They are both stoked and she mails the recording to Bad Boy. She hopes it gets included in the remix. At least she doesn’t delude herself into thinking she can sing. Thanks, Drita!
Renee and Carla meet. Renee tells Carla about going to court for her father and now Junior is in the past and buried. She also tells her about Karen’s spa, and their partnership. She invites Carla as her guest to the grand opening party. Carla’s not sure about that. They are not her friends. Renee wishes they could all be friends, including Drita.
Ramona goes to the Drunken Monkey and she and Big Ang talk about Ramona’s jewelry being in the hands of the Feds. They then talk about Karen’s spa grand opening party. Big Ang wants to know if Ramona would ever make up with Drita. She just wants everyone to get along and for everything to be over with as far as Drita is concerned. Ramona has no desire to make up with Drita.
Renee, Carla and Drita meet for lunch. Drita tells them about her being cast for a rap video. She also tells them about Lee being transferred to Brooklyn. Renee says this means Lee will be trying to get back together with Drita. Drita says no way. Carla says once he’s back she might change her mind. Renee tells Drita about Karen’s spa opening. Renee wants Drita to make up with Karen. Drita is totally tired of it and if Karen can go back to the old Karen, she can be civil to her. Drita wants to put it all behind her. Renee says they need to take it slow and steady. Renee says one down, one to go.
Karen and her daughter Karina take a tour of the new Spa. She wants Karina to know she is bringing her back to New York to live with her. Karina tells Karen she’ll have to think about it. Karen is a little hurt, but she doesn’t blame Karina for not wanting leave her grandparents and friends and Arizona. Karen tells Karina her she understands but she can’t go back to Arizona and have the same opportunities she has in New York. She wants to make sure Karina will be able to go to college and even be able to buy her a car one day. Karen realizes she is the adult and will be making the ultimate decision about moving Karina to New York to live with her.
Drita shows up at Sin City to shoot her rap video with French Montana. She plays the getaway driver in the bank robbery and they are all wearing nun masks. Drita is a natural in the video.
It’s spa grand opening day. It looks really nice when the doctor arrives, but he notices the lasers aren’t there. Karen is not happy with Ramona because guests are there and the lasers are not ready. Renee didn’t have the gift bags ready either, but they put them together at the last minute. Everybody is having a good time and getting samples of the services. Since Karen is in such a good mood, Renee asks her if she would be willing to sit down with Drita so they can at least be cordial with each other. Karen agrees, but I can tell she’s not into making up with Drita. I think Karen still wants the drama and is not really interested in what Drita has to say. But she is playing nice and Renee is happy.
Drita is told that her rap verse is going to be part of the video. She is so excited. She is a rapper now. She can’t believe it. She says she has to thank God. They take her immediately to do the filming of her rap with French Montana. She kills it. I’m happy for Drita.
Karen’s cousin tells her she would not meet with Drita and that Drita is just jealous of her. Karen is not interested in fist fighting with Drita but three strikes and you’re out. Her cousin tells Karen to “crack her jaw.” No wonder Karen is the way she is with her cousin and Ramona talking crap in her ear constantly.
Next week it looks as though things aren’t all sunshine and roses between Carla and her ex.
The Amazing Race – Leg 10 April 29, 2012 by MelTheHound
Welcome back kids. 5 teams left after last weeks non elimination round. Bopper and Mark came in last place after a grueling day at a Bollywood dance audition and will have to complete a speed bump at some point. That point is the beginning of the day for them but since they arrived so late, they have plenty of time before they even get started for the day. Besides, Mark is hooked up to an IV for dehydration. Let’s get to it.
To refresh, Combat was in first place, Brenchel is second, BP is third, Divorced is fourth, and Kentucky is Last. We start the episdode at last week’s pit stop, Bolgotty Palace which was the head guy’s palace when the Dutch occupied India 300 years ago. The teams are dismissed in the order and by time interval that they arrived. The first to leave are Combat as they won the previous leg. Each team must go to the temple to receive a blessing and get their first clue. It must not be too far away because we only see each team jogging to the temple. They get their blessing, paint the dot (or whatever it’s called) on their foreheads, and then get their clue. It’s a Roadblock. It is ALSO a Fast Forward. The way the fast forward works is the first one to complete it, is the only team that can use it. Once completed, a fast forward lets the team go directly to the pit stop. The teams can choose whether or not to even attempt it. Combat, Dave and Rachel, cannot do the fast forward because they’ve already used one. So they go on to the roadblock (I’ll get to that in a second). Brenchel arrives second and decides to try and do the fast forward. BP arrives third and assumes someone else took the fast forward as I would guess Divorced assumed as well. Brenchel gets to the Fast Forward and discover it is considered a good luck blessing to let them shave your head. Brendon is down for it, he’s nearly shaved anyway but Rachel wants no part of it. She says she paid $500 for her extensions and keeps asking Bendon if he wants her to do it. I’m sure that inside, he was saying yes but he says, do what you want. As they drive away, she’s still asking and he’s giving the same answer. Okay, she didn’t want to shave her head but they’ve just put themselves in jeopardy.
Continuing on.. The Roadblock is to spin 40 feet of rope from coconut husks on an old fashioned spinning wheel. They don’t actually have to spin the wheel, that is done for them. The women there doing the making of the rope of course make it look simple because the are experienced at it. Basically the way it is done is to get the rope started on the spinning wheel and at a steady pace, walk backwards while feeding more coconut husk on to the twine that is already spun. They know they have it right, If it stays in tact. Eventually all 4 teams, except Kentucky, are there doing this at the same time. BP notices that no one has taken the fast forward and begins to worry that Kentucky may take it and jump in front of everyone. They ask Rachel what it was and at first she just says they decided not to do it. They later ask again and she finally tells them what it was. Now BP is Really worried that they are all in a race for last place. Naturally, they are running their mouths about how no one is playing the game strategically. Well, Dumbass, you could have attempted the fast forward too. At least Brenchel gave it a shot. Anyway, After the 40 feet of rope is spun they must take 4 bundles of already spun rope and spin it on to spools. This is about as primitive as it gets folks. Wooden spools, a large feeder bobbin to hold the stock of rope, and a nail as the handle for the spool. It comes down to a race to complete the spools before they can get their next clue. Combat finishes first and they’re off. Divorced finishes Second and they’re off. Now, Here is where Karma catches with Vanessa. Karma reached out to Trip Vanessa as she was running to catch a taxi to their next destination and she thinks she’s broken her ankle.
Go ahead. Laugh your asses off, I did and I’ll wait
Turns out, Vanessa twisted her ankle and she isn’t going to let it stop her so they proceed on. Brenchel and BP finish about the same time but not before Rachel finally reveals what the Fast Forward was. At some point, Rachel acknowledges in a TH, that a woman did previously let her head be shaved but that woman looked pretty without her hair. Rachel feels she needs her hair to look pretty. What Rachel failed to mention is that woman that shaved her head, also won the race along with her partner.
The next clue after they find ‘the barber under the ancient tree’ is a Detour, PackaDerm or Packabox (I think). The PackaDerm is to decorate an elephant for ceremonial purposes exactly as an example given. Packabox is to sift and load several crates of Ginger spice and deliver them to the distributor. I think it was 10 and each must weigh a certain amount before they can close it up. Guess which pair of dumbasses chose That one? Yep, BP. They say that every leg they’ve won, it was the manual labor detour that helped them do it. Remind me fellas, Exactly how many was that. We’re on number 10. Of the last nine, Combat has won 5, Kentucky won once, and I think Brenchel even pulled off a win. I’m Pretty sure at least one of the now gone teams did as well. That leaves what, Two? Tops? Not really a track record I’d want to hang my one million dollars on. We’ll get back to them in a minute. The other three teams choose the elephant task. You know Vanessa just Loves Elephants (and Monkeys). Says her home is decorated with them. I’m not going to bust her chops about it, different strokes sort of thing, just isn’t my taste in decor (which lately seems to be dog hair and dirt, one thing I Hate about Spring). Combat, Divorced, and Brenchel get to the elephants in that order. They choose their elephants and get to work. That part of the task is completed when they are Both on top of the elephant with one holding a huge umbrella. Seems simple, right? It is. The Next part however wasn’t so simple and clean. They must load a total of 15 wheelbarrows Each, of Elephant pooh, and dump it on to a flat bed truck (probably as fertilizer). So they all get to what has been call The worse job on the face of the earth, Shoveling Shit. Both members of each team participate and it’s the men hauling the wheelbarrows. Brendon says this is no problem for him, his father was a brick mason and he had a childhood of moving bricks. I can identify with him here. I’m no stranger to that task myself. I have to give to all 3 teams, none of them bitched too loudly about doing it. The only snafu here might be that Vanessa thinks Brenchel went from 3 to 7 missing 4, 5, and 6. Remember that. They don’t Say anything to Brenchel but… Remember that. Meanwhile, BP decided to take the crates of Ginger. This is Hard, Manual Labor and it isn’t just filling boxes. They are at it for what seems like hours and they are complaining about it most of the time. At one point they decide to try and have a little fun and mock Dave and Rachel by role playing about all their bickering during the challenges. They finally get all the crates they need and begin loading them on to this 2 wheeled cart. Right away, I’m thinking they are doing it wrong, this cart should be a little Front heavy to avoid it tipping back. What do I know, I’m not there doing it. Anyway, Remember Karma visiting Vanessa? Well, she wasn’t done for the day. The way these crates are made is they are wooden and the corners are protected with angles of sheet metal, poorly bent and with sharp exposed edges. JJ (I think) Sliced through his leather glove and cut the hell out of his pinky. I don’t expect you to laugh at this one but if you want to, go ahead. Karma two, Trash talkers Zero. Karma wasn’t quite done with BP though. Remember I said how *I* would have loaded this cart? Turns out I’m right. The cart kept wanting to tip back so one had to walk along behind it to hold it Up while the other had to try and push down on the handles to keep it from tipping. Fellas, It’s all about Leverage. Art kept trying to move closer to the cart hanging on to the handles when he should have been moving further away. Any way, They manage it, and get the goods delivered.
Some time in all of that, we see Kentucky can finally begin Their day. Before they can go to the Temple however, they must complete their speed bump. I would say that time-wise, they started about the time BP was about half done. Remember, the fast forward is still available. They get to the speed bump in this task they must paint a the belly of a Pulikali tiger dancer. Bopper is always about the fun of it. Never seems to bitch about anything. Knows how fortunate he is to even still be there and just positive, no matter what but isn’t gushy about it. You just have to like a guy like that. He says, he’s use to this sort of thing because he’s always painting with his daughters, painting their nails, finger painting and the like. They get the task done in what seems like a short time and are now on their way to actually start the leg of the race.
Meanwhile, the final clue of the day after the detour is to take the ferry to the next pit stop. The race is on. Combat gets there first and Rachel notes that she wishes the ferry would just go so the other teams cannot be on the same one. Dave offers the ferry boat operator money to accept what he has for a load, and Go (before any of the other teams arrive). The way they show the edit, we don’t see money change hand but I think the operator accepts and they’re off. Maybe it was just time to leave. They depart, Just as Brenchel and I assume, Divorced, arrives to see the boat leaving. Brenchel and Divorced will be in a foot race to the finish line of the leg.
Back with Kentucky, they’ve reached the Temple so they can begin their day of racing. They discover it’s a fast forward opportunity. Knowing they don’t have a chance in hell of completing the leg before another team, they choose to see if it’s still available (which it is). BP, still complaining about no one using strategy to win the game, is stuck in major traffic. Seems India doesn’t have traffic laws like we do and one of BP is bitching at the people holding up traffic as if he’s in NYC. Have I mentioned that I think these two are a pair of tools? Even so, they were right about one thing but just don’t know it for certain. They are in a race for last place.
Here is what they Didn’t show in the episode but is available on the CBS website. On the way to the Fast Forward, the auto-rickshaw that Kentucky was in, Ran out of gas. They’re stuck waiting for someone to bring some and it’s taking forever. Mark is backseat car sick again and Bopper says he’d like to have one of these little vehicles. Also states that he passed his driving test on the last leg but they didn’t give him his license. The Only reason I can think of they did Not take the Other transport that was with them at the time, is that they must keep a Camera crew with them as well. These rickshaws only hold 3 people. The driver and two passengers. I think the camera crew may be one person. I’m Wondering, if Bopper may have been eluding to the idea, that He could have taken the other one with Mark and the camera guy and just let his out of gas driver sweat it out on the road.. That’s what I would have been thinking anyway. Yes, I know. Dumb idea. Get lost once, be lost forever in that place.
At the finish line. Combat arrives First. Phil informs them that this is number Six for them. As such, their prize is $10,000 cash, Each. A little later, thanks to Dave’s move of bribing the ferry captain, Brenchel arrives in second place with Divorced a close few seconds behind. Vanessa is STILL looking at Rachel’s assets at the finish line.
Go ahead and Laugh, I am.
Phil announces their standings in the race leg and since I’m sure he’s talked to production, states he Hopes he doesn’t have to give out a penalty. Divorced pipes up with the wheelbarrow count thing. Brendon says why would you even bring that up. I agree. I’m sure the people at the task were counting and they gave them the go ahead. Vanessa and Rachel have it out a bit going back to the comment about seeing Rachel’s assets on the watermelon cart weeks ago. In the end, they apologize to each other for all the remarks and shake hands. Will this end well between them? Probably not, they’ll never be besties but at this point in the race, neither matters to each other. Just someone to beat. That’s the way it always should have been.
Kentucky finally gets to the fast forward, find out it’s still available, and have at it. Of course, Mark is already a cue-ball and Bopper gets his head shaved, for the first time ever. They don’t show much of the race to the finish line. Only that BP gets there first and in fourth place. Convinced that they are eliminated, they begin their swansong only to be told by Phil that they are indeed in fourth and still in the race. Phil teases JJ a bit about the tears who of course, denies them.
You guessed it, if you didn’t see. Kentucky, Bopper and Mark are eliminated. Not for not trying, but due to an empty gas tank early in their day. So long fellas. I go to Kentucky every summer and if I ever run into either of you, I hope to learn you are exactly the same in real life as you were on the show. You made it more fun to watch.
I’m sorry folks that I didn’t actually Name some of these places. My DVR kind of crapped out on me during the episode and I’m not sure why. Other stuff recorded fine but not TAR. So, what I’ve written above is from memory because I really don’t care to sit through the episode online. You can if you want, it’s on the CBS website by the time you read this.
This leg of the race, other than (I thought) from BP, there wasn’t a lot of trash talking going on. Not even with Vanessa. I still don’t Like her but I’ll accept that Karma did my job for me on this episode and just be happy that Vanessa was still looking at Rachel’s assets at the finish line.
This season Ends next week with I guess an elimination and then the final leg back home. It’s a two hour episode kids so,
Til then, Peace.
Meredith has been blogging GCB for us over the past few weeks but this week, she brings us a show she really enjoys! Jerseylicious!
Jerseylicious by Meredith
To say I’m excited about blogging about Jerseylicious is an understatement. These cast of characters are so foreign to me and this is coming from someone who not only grew up in New Jersey, but lived 10 minutes from The Gatsby. (For anyone not familiar with NJ, The Gatsby, which sits on Route 22, is an absolute dump (the street, I can’t vouch for the salon). Yes their fake tans, talon-like nails, and chunky jewelry are not indigenous to the Garden State and the stereotyping of my beloved motherland should bother me, but it doesn’t. Anyway let’s jump into this episode.
There’s trouble in paradise for Anthony’s new salon. Construction has hit yet another snafu and the opening will be delayed even further. According to Anthony’s tweets the salon is just opening now, so things were definitely held up way past filming.
Thomas the fashion designer (the guy who designed an “Olivia” inspired dress last season) is back and creating an entire line of Olivia dresses. Seriously? Olivia looks like a streetwalker 50% of the time and he’s her muse? Olivia seems shocked; I’m not. Thomas is no dummy; Olivia equals TV time, which equals potential sales. I can’t say much about his taste in style, but he certainly has business smarts. Not only does Thomas want to design a line based on Olivia, but he wants to style live mannequins into an army of Olivia’s for his new store opening (once again more camera time, nice one Tommy!)
And what better way to raise Anthony’s spirits and capital than to have Anthony’s team style the event? Sure they don’t actually have a “mobile” team and Olivia and Tracy both already work for Gatsby To Go, but Olivia doesn’t see this as a problem. Tracy questions whether or not she should talk to Gale first and Olivia quickly jumps down her throat. I used to be a big Olivia fan, but she is quickly losing appeal in my eyes. Tracy makes a valid point, but she isn’t willing to hear her out because it’s Tracy, Public Enemy #1. I think Olivia is really banking on the fans to remember how manipulative and mean Tracy has been in past seasons to maintain her own fan base, but Tracy has taken a page out of the Camille Grammer season two playbook and is a lot more likable now.
Tracy ultimately decides to talk to Gale about what Olivia is doing by giving the business to Anthony and not The Gatsby and does it in a fairly mature way. I can’t say I blame her. Last time she tried to do something behind Gale’s back she got fired. Gale is understandably pissed because it is essentially money stolen from her pocket. I wonder if she knew the financial troubles Anthony was having and if that would have softened her view on the whole situation.
We’re forced to suffer through a whole lot of Michelle this episode. She’s not even a lovable airhead; she’s completely unlikable. “I don’t ask guys out because I’m pretty, pretty girls don’t do desperate.” Well you know what, Michelle, I think your personality is down right ugly based on that statement. Seriously, do these girls not know that the talking head interviews get aired? Actually in Michelle’s case, she may have no clue as we find out that she also thinks Olivia’s new IPhone with the Siri component on it will help her figure out how to snag a date with Tango, the new hottie at The Gatsby. The only thing Siri suggests is Tango lessons, which starts out as a chance to trick Tango into a double date with Olivia, Mikey, and of course Michelle, but turns into a Gatsby outing. Michelle looks like the poor man’s Evita at the lesson and her obvious hints to Tango were completely mortifying to watch. She can’t figure out why he can’t take a hint and thinks maybe he is dumb. No Tango is a GENIUS he is avoiding your clear advances! His excuse when Miguel corners him about it at the salon; He doesn’t date people he works with. Yeah…ok. He finally relents and asks Michelle out for a bite to eat. Is this a budding romance? To Be Continued…
There is also a fun boring conversation between Alexa and Tracy over how awesome their boyfriend’s are and Tracy’s example of this is how Corey always texts her that he can’t wait to marry her. Yeah…I find that weird. The kid is what 21? They’ve been together for a few months? I feel like they are playing house and no one is willing to tell them how creepy their relationship is. Maybe I’m not as sentimental as some, but it seems that their relationship is moving a bit fast and is too focused on the future than the actual day to day relationship. This is cemented when Tracy takes Alexa to go preemptive engagement ring shopping and picks out the gaudiest rings imaginable, but maybe they just looked that way against her fake tan and fanned out, way too long acrylics.
It’s just hours before Thomas’ store opening and the Anthony Robert’s crew is there getting ready to start hair and makeup. Olivia drops the bomb that the style inspiration is based on her and Tracy’s face is priceless. I really can’t blame her, but I do find it hard to believe that they all went to this event without having any clue what the style direction was. Makes for better TV I guess. Tracy makes the point to Olivia that it would have been nice to know that she was creating an Army of Olivia’s beforehand or she wouldn’t have agreed to come along and Olivia is quick to call her jealous and a copycat of her amazing style and Tracy retorts by calling her a bitch. This storyline is getting old and happens at least once an episode. Let’s settle it right now, you both look like bad drag queens. Move on! The fight quickly becomes unprofessional and Anthony is forced to play peacemaker. As if he doesn’t have enough to stress about. If these women were not on TV they would certainly get the boot from their jobs.
The event itself looks to be pretty successful, the styling is actually great considering it’s based off of Olivia, but I can’t say much about the clothing. The pieces look like something you could by at Charlotte Russe or Forever 21, possibly Forever 23 if there was such a thing. But it wouldn’t be a Jerseylicious event if there wasn’t a bit of drama, which Gale brings when she shows up to the event to confront Olivia. Now, as a business owner, do you think that was really fair to do to Thomas, Gale? Forget Olivia and Tracy’s lack of professionalism, it’s clear who they get it from. Tracy actually comes over and suggests that they move it outside before it escalates, but Olivia and Gale refuse to move. Olivia puts two and two together and realizes Tracy was the nark who told Gale and jumps on her for being “shady.” I’m sorry Olivia, it wasn’t shady, it was responsible. Olivia accuses Tracy of only caring about herself and her job security, but how can you blame her? It’s her livelihood and she’s already lost a job once with Gale for being distrustful. That’s not shady, that’s smart. Olivia is making it harder and harder to hate Tracy as this season progresses.
Next episode, surprise surprise, more Olivia and Tracy drama! Until then feel free to Tweet me @MereCon about the Jerseylicious divas or anything Housewives related!
Our Mad Men blogger, Aurora is toughing it out in Hawaii right now, we’ll give her a pass this week although she did say she would try to get us the blog soon. I won’t hold my breath since we’re competing with the sights and sun of Hawaii.
Meredith will bring us her thoughts on GCB later this week. Thanks to both ladies!
Another amazing set of blogs from our wonderful BB, thanks to her for such hard work. Two hours of Celebrity Apprentice and Mob Wives is a lot in one night, thank you so much BB! Love you so much BB! xo
To MelTheHound, Thank you for the great Amazing Race blog! That show keeps proving why it wins all of the reality show awards! No one recaps it better than our MelTheHound (Jeff) He will be back for our Survivor recap on Thursday! Don’t miss it. Love ya Jeff! xoxo
Here’s a great article by Terry Aley! http://terryaley.com/?p=6608
So glad Terry is back blogging again, really missed him! :) xo
Follow me on Twitter @LynnNChicago
Friend me on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/lynnnchicago
Tonight on Bravo – Bethenny Ever After
Watch What Happens Live
Until Next Time…